I loaned a friend of mine my copy of the TV series, "Trailer Park Boys" a very funny, politically incorrect mockumentary about the lives of denizens of the Sunnyvale Trailer Park in Nova Scotia. She's stuck flat on her back for a while in all the wrong ways. I know she hasn't watched it because she has not commented on how this is one of the funniest TV shows ever. So I dropped her a note to watch the damn thing:
Dear Board one,
It's been weeks since you started your performance art piece where you imitate a pile of lumber. Back when you started this project, I gave you a copy of "Trailer Park Boys" to watch and I know you haven't watched it yet, because if you had, you would have called me choking back fits of laughter.
Come on, you know you want to watch it.
You keep thinking, "Oh, I could watch that, but it will be there tomorrow."
And you keep putting it off.
Meanwhile, time marches on.
You become old.
They become old.
Yes, it's true. The DVD is slowly breaking down. Time takes it's toll and eventually the DVD will be nothing more than dust. Mulch for your plants. It's also harder to watch.
But long before that, Julian, Ricky and Bubbles will cease to be funny. They will have lost their comic timing. They sit, patiently, waiting for someone to entertain. They see a room full of people come and go and barely anyone glances that direction at them. They slip into a depression. They drink too much, they get bloated and they start smoking more and caring less. Some people have had house fires started by neglected DVDs. Thank goodness you live in an apartment.
One day you break down and decide to pop the DVD in the machine. You hit 'play' and nothing happens. They all just stare at you. You say something like, "stupid show. I thought this was supposed to be funny." and they glare back and tell you to go fuck yourself.
The problem is that you waited too long. Now they lost the edge. The cast is pissed off, drunk and they don't care. Sometimes it's so bad I have to buy another DVD instead. This is why I suggest you never buy DVDs at a garage sale. You know they're already pissed off. It's hard enough to watch a drunk and high Adam Sandler film without him trying to kick your ass. Actually, that might be better than the movie.
Don't let it happen to you. Sit down and watch "Trailer Park Boys" tonight.
