Young guy walks into a pub in the highlands of Scotland, orders a pint and sits down next to an older gentleman, who has obviously already been there a good part of the afternoon.
At first the older man is quiet, but after a time he turns to other and says, "Ho, laddy, d'ye see tha' wall over there? I built that wall wi' me own two hands! Aye, I carried the stones up from the river wi' me bare hands, and laid 'em straight and true. I fitted and mortared them with care and skill, but do they call me MacGregor the stonemason? Nae, laddy, they do not."
He takes another drink from his glass, and is quiet again for a few moments, but then he turns again to the young man and says, "Ho, laddy, d'ye see this bar here? I built this bar wi' me own two hands! I framed it square and planed it with me own hands 'til it was level and true, but do they call me MacGregor the carpenter? Nae, lad."
He is quiet again and takes another drink, but then suddenly turns again and says, "But you fuck just one goat...!!!"